So I was going to post about my Jesus Horcrux theory this week, but that post isn't quite where I want it to be yet, and I just had the most spectacular, up lifting evening and I really wanted to share it.
Obligatory Mental Health Update:
I'm doing okay. Not great yet, but I imagine that will come more with the professional counseling I'm in the process of procuring. In the meantime I am doing things that make me happy, trying to be with energy-giving people as much as possible, eating on a somewhat regular schedule, wearing my new Hufflepuff beanie like a security blanket, and listening to more Fall Out Boy than normal. Because sometimes you just need to live into the emo a little.
Update Done.
On to what I wanted to share.
I work with a troop of Cadette Girl Scouts on Monday nights. It's a troop I've been with going on 6 years, almost as long as I've been in Seattle, and I have watched as some of these amazing girls have grown into the outstanding young women who I sat with tonight. They are as much my kids as any of the others I have worked with, and I claim them all the more not only because I have known them for so long, but because they are a truly amazing group to work with. They constantly amaze me with their insights into the world, their compassion for other people, and their willingness to learn about the world and everyone who lives in it. Tonight was no exception.
These beautiful (inside and out) talented, brilliant young women are in the process of planning an event coming up in February where they have to lead a group of Brownies (2nd and 3rd graders) through a set of activities that will help the younger girls learn to tell stories about important social issues. They are old enough now that as a leader I mostly guide their conversation and give them space to come up with their own structure and ideas for how they want to lead things. Our conversation tonight should have revolved around age appropriate games and how to talk to 6-8 year-olds about storytelling, but as so often happens in my troop (and let's be real, any group of kids I work with) we got slightly off topic.
I had mentioned earlier in the evening, just as small talk before we started the official meeting, that I had corrected use of pronouns about a nonbinary coworker recently, and several of the girls mentioned the book I Am Jazz, which some of them had read for school as part of banned books week. So when we got to the part of planning that included selecting stories about portrayals of girls/women in media, one scout offered that as an option.
This child is my heart. She is wonderfully boisterous, never sits still, and would talk almost constantly given the opportunity. She is me at 11. So of course, she not only offered the book as an option to share, but proceeded to educate the entire room on the fact that most trans kids know who they are at a fairly young age, but have to live in a body they are uncomfortable with until they are older, and that we should provide space for them too because they matter and they are people.
You guys, those were literally her exact words. I have never been closer to tears in a Girl Scout meeting.
This spurred instantaneous hand raising for more than half of the other 14 girls present, because if one of them shares they all have to, and they all have stories/facts to share about everything.
One thing I should probably point out at this point: Girl Scouts is a very open and wonderful organization. It is also a national organization, meaning it has general really broad rules, as well as council/region specific rules. Pretty much there are a lot of rules. Most of the time that just means we have to do a lot of paperwork and make sure we have proper documents for trips and things, but it also means that there is an actual permission form that we are required to fill out and get signed if we want to talk about "sensitive topics". Human Sexuality, as well as religion, cultural/family values, or anything "of a personal nature" is on every version of it that I found. And every council has one.
Our troop fills out that form with any topics we may cover at the beginning of the year, which gives me and the other leaders pretty free reign to open conversation to whatever the girls want to talk about, which has included a few different awesome dialogues about sexuality and gender. It also means that we can only talk about those things with our specific girls unless we get confirmation that every troop coming to this even has also received that permission.
So, heart broken by the kindness and willingness these young women have to give space to those that so often have to make their own, I told the girls exactly what I think of our sensitive topics form.
It is an unfortunate truth that we still live in a world where whole groups of people need to ask permission to speak their truth. And it's stupid that in a place like Seattle we still have to tiptoe around being queer. It wasn't until one of the girls in my troop started to wear pan colors on a regular basis that I even thought letting them know about my own place in the LGBT community was a good idea. She and I now share many winks and nods during meetings, because we're cute, and because I am only willing to create spaces where everyone has a voice and a place. It helps that my girls are all woke AF and are jazzed about supporting pretty much any community of people that need help.
I got off my soapbox, somewhat teary, by telling them that we are always going to be a space for people to be themselves, even if we can't necessarily talk about the issues specifically. And bless her if my 11 year old self didn't raise her hand and ask if, since All That Jazz was a little too much reading for the age we're working with, she could instead direct them to a more age appropriate picture book about trans kids.
Because to her it's not about whether or not a topic is "sensitive". It's not about whether or not it's okay to talk about it. It's a problem. And it's one she's going to solve. We didn't have time tonight to get really in depth or let them all share, but you had better believe we will continue the conversation, and I'm sure it won't surprise to learn that the conversation immediately derailed into the girls quoting from the Love, Simon trailer, because it's not fair for some people to feel weird about their sexuality when everyone has one.
What should you take away from this post, besides the fact that I know some of the coolest #Tweens on the planet?
Be subversive. And do it for the good of people who are so often forgotten, even in a part of the world that is trying to push every corner of the envelope. Live in a way that makes space for people, just because they're people too. And if you are a part of one of those communities and you feel like giving up, know that there is a kickass group of young women who love and accept you for who you are.
They listen to Oprah Winfrey (another derailment of the evening was talking about this speech) when she tells them times are changing for the better. They read about and then act on social issues. They are willing to hear about and sit in their privilege and value perspectives that aren't their own And if I have any say in it, they will grow into even stronger young women who are going to take this world in their hands in the not too distant future and run past bigotry, hate, and fear to lead us to a time where there is a space for everyone.
And goddamn if that doesn't give you the hope to make it through whatever night you find yourself struggling to get out of. I am honored and blessed (no hashtag) to be able to lay the foundation on which they will run. They are the change we need. and they're coming a lot faster than the Powers That Be can handle.
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